A man wakes up with a big hangover the morning after attending his company's annual Summer Party. He can't even remember how he got home from the party let alone how he got so drunk and is deathly afraid of what he may have done or said the night before to offend his wife.
The man forces his eyes open, however, and the first things he sees are two headache tablets next to a glass of water on his night table, and, next to them, a single red rose! He sits up with difficulty and sees his clothing hung on the back of his chair all clean and pressed and the rest of the house all spic and span and in perfect order.
Incredulous, the man takes the tablets, then winces when he sees a nasty black eye looking back at him from the bathroom mirror. Then he finds a note next to the red rose on the night table: "Sweetie, breakfast is waiting for you on the stove. I left early to buy the ingredients to make your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! The note was signed, "Your loving wife".
The man then stumbles into the kitchen and incredibly enough, there is a hot breakfast waiting for him along with steaming hot tea, and the morning paper. His daughter Jessie is also at the table, eating. "Jess... what happened last night?" The man asks, with some trepidation.
"Well, you came home around four o'clock in the morning, drunk and out of your senses. You tripped and fell onto the coffee table and broke it, and then you vomited all over the bathroom floor, and got this black eye when you crashed into the table edge."
Baffled, the man asked Jessie, "Then why is everything in such perfect shape and so clean? Why is there a rose on my nightstand, and breakfast on the stove waiting for me?"
"Oh that...", Jessie replies, "Well, Mom pulled you into your bedroom, and when she tried to undress you, you yelled, "Leave me alone, I'm married and I love my wife!""
Never heard of Triumph? Now you have... He's been a big hit in the United States, a character created by Saturday Night Live (SNL). He's even been on Hollywood Squares as 1 of the Celebrity!
Now, let me warn you in advance. Crude language and lots of Sarcasm will be coming out from his clips!
A tough looking biker had been in the biker bar for quite some time when he finally decided it was time, once again to hit the road. He stepped through the front door of the bar and instantly realized that his bike had vanished from the spot he had parked it.
"All right" he said loudly, coming back into the busy biker bar "I'm going to have a shot of whisky and if my hog isn't back up front by the time I'm done, what happened in Detroit will happen here too!"
With that many of the bikers ran out of the bar and within moments one came back to tell the tough biker that his hog was now parked in front of the bar for him. When the tough guy started to leave the bartender asked him.
"Pardon me, stranger, but what happened in Detroit?"
The tough biker replied casually: "I had to walk back to my hotel!"
I watched the actual thing on ESPN, so I decided to share this with those who didn't have SCV in their homes. It is damn hilarious I tell you! Especially when claiming 'his' award! Haha! Enjoy!
I watched all this videos when I was in National Service. You must really be wondering what kind of liability was I serving?! Getting to watch videos, had an e-mail, get to go home everyday, to add icing to the cake, I wasn't even a clark or close to it! Whateverrrrrr... Just enjoy these movie spoofs which is very creative!
Two high school sweethearts who went out together for four years in high school were both virgins; they enjoyed losing their virginity with each other in 10th grade. When they graduated, they wanted to both go to the same college but the girl was accepted to a college on the east coast, and the guy went to the west coast. They agreed to be faithful to each other and spend anytime they could together. As time went on, the guy would call the girl and she would never be home, and when he wrote, she would take weeks to return the letters. Even when he emailed her, she took days to return his messages. Finally, she confessed to him she wanted to date around. He didn't take this very well and increased his calls, letters, and emails trying to win back her love. Because she became annoyed, and now had a new boyfriend, she wanted to get him off her back. So, what she did is this: she took a polaroid picture of her sucking her new boyfriend's unmentionables and sent it to her old boyfriend with a note reading, "I found a new boyfriend, leave me alone." Well, needless to say, this guy was heartbroken but, even more so, was pissed. So, what he did next was awesome. He wrote on the back of the photo the following, "Dear Mom and Dad, having a great time at college, please send more money!" and mailed the picture to her parents.
